I realized this last night.
I didn't start out the night as an idiot- in my opinion. I guess I slowly transitioned to that state....
Yesterday when the Angsty Teen said she wanted a pink stripe in her hair I didn't say I would do it. In fact, I just told her that might be fun... and no, I didn't tell her to call the saloon... wait, make that salon... I merely said, "What a fun idea. I wonder if salons do that?" To which she replied, "I will call Xpressions!"
(Seriously, I hate that name... sounds like a porn shop... how hard would it have been to put an "E" in front of that... Didn't they have enough money to buy a vowel?)
I digress... so she called them (only because it was her idea) and they said that they only did the clip on pink hair inserts and feathers... no dyeing. Dang.
Since the Angsty Teen likes me sometimes but seriously considers me an idiot most of the time, I really didn't think she would ask me to do the dyeing. So, in my defense, I was really caught off guard when she started by being sweet... and then, wham, she whacked me up side the head with the request.
I said...."maybe"...I thought we could go to Walmart and look at products... hoping for something really easy. This is what she found.
She bought the kit.... and was so sweet... so sure I could do it... that I. said. yes.
I truthfully did not think I could mess it up. I thought it was idiot-proof. Although in dealing with the Angsty Teen and anything slightly permanent... look out.
Side note: I forgot how much she hates her straight teeth. Someday I will show you a "before" picture... that kid seriously looked like she could have had a walk-on part in the Twilight movie. Now her teeth are WONDERFUL and perfectly straight... and all she does is complain that they are "too perfect"...
A stripe... that sounds pretty simple... but when push came to shove she didn't really want a stripe.... she wanted a swath. I would have put a small stripe from the temple back. She wanted a wide swath back by her neck so when she put her hair up it would show nicely.
Got it done... helped her rinse it out because as much as I dislike the bathroom floor and the sink in the upstairs bathroom, I am not in a financial position to replace it them. Got the swath rinsed out... and I left so she could shower.
Soon, thereafter, I heard weeping and wailing... screams, actually. The noise coming from the upstairs could quite easily be heard in the living room even with the door shut... and with my ears plugged... and with me loudly saying "La la la la la I am not listening to you."
This was all about the fact that the swath looked purple instead of pink. " It's not pink!" "It's purple!" "I hate purple!" "It was supposed to be pink!" "I told you we should have bleached it first." (Yeah, that would have been a great idea....) "I hate it!" "I knew it wouldn't turn out." "I don't have any purple clothes!" "I hate purple!"
Those of you with boys.. or with small daughters..or with non-angsty girls... or with no children at all that think that your children would never be this angsty.... Good luck. I hope you are right.
Told her to go to bed.... this was obviously not a good time to deal with it... I drank a glass of wine.
This is really all her own fault. Why would she ask me, the Idiot Mother, who has aging eyes, and had been sipping wine for an hour to do this to her hair?
I know, I am the adult. I should have listened to Nancy Reagan....*
Today we were at a gas station and I heard the Angsty Teen tell a friend, "I thought it was purple... but look how pink it is!" Giggle giggle, laugh laugh, hahaha.
|The Wide Swath|
|Look at those beautiful teeth!|
*"Just say 'no!'"