Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Ten Commandments for the Angsty Teen

Last week Kati made the quick trip home to get this car:
Kind of a cute, little thing...
That means that her old car is just sitting around:
The perfect large-enough-to-be-safe-with-a-hundred-door-dings-and-scrapes car for a  new driver...
Well, the Angsty Teen thinks it is her car... but it really isn't... especially because she isn't 16 until mid-November...
The Angsty Teen HATES this cartoon... but I think it's hilarious.

Anyway, we bought the Taurus from Kati in hopes that the Angsty Teen would be able to drive it come November.

Note: If you'd have told me many years ago that I would buy a car for a 16 year old (or even a 15 year old) I wouldn't have believed you... I've changed my mind about that one...

Anyway, just because we have an extra car sitting behind our house... doesn't mean that the Angsty Teen will automatically get to drive it once she gets her license.

These are some of the rules that she will have to adhere to in order to gain that privilege:

Angsty Teen's Ten Commandments to getting that car: 

Thou Shalt...

1. Be kind to your mother.

2. Be responsible, respectful, and fun to be around... with your parents... not just your friends.

3. Figure out a way to finance your need for gas. (That way must not be illegal, immoral, or life-threatening in any way, shape, or form.)

4. Not be a slutty, drunken, drug-using tramp. I don't think this requires any explanation...

5. Not become impregnated... or, worse yet, get thine self afflicted with an STD.

6. Not use crystal meth... Have you seen the before and after pics? How would you not get caught???? Wait... that probably falls under #4... I get a do-over for #6...

6. Continue to get the best grades you can possibly get... and don't expect us to believe that will ever be a C, based on how you've been doing so far in high school.

7. Not throw large drunken house-trashing parties and get caught by the police... Well, you can't throw them even if you DON'T get caught by the police...

8. Do anything in your power to make your mother's life easier... extra points are awarded for creativity.

9. Be willing to be my designated driver on occasion. (I'm looking forward to utilizing this feature.)

10. Show me you are ready for this responsibility by keeping your room and bathroom waaaayyyy better than they are currently. Yeah, I know... they are better than they used to be... but...

Oh, and, Angsty Teen? Once you actually are able to drive that car... and I want to go on record as saying that I'm positive you will get to do that before you turn 21.... then there will be a whole other set of rules for when you are behind the wheel of that car without your mother at your side.

At that point, I will refer to Michelle's rules for her 17 year old and add a few of my own.

Also, I know that deep in your heart you are already eternally grateful to me for taking you out driving and not making you go out with the Stern German... therefore, you should be constantly referring to rules 1, 8, and 9... just sayin'.


  1. hahaha love this - and I may have to steal these rules in a few years.

  2. Bahahaha! I love it!

    I'm so excited that Kati got a beautiful new ride!