Tuesday, June 4, 2013

My Life

This collage pretty much sums up the relationship between the Angsty Teen and the Stern German:
As much as the Angsty Teen is similar to the "Girl With the Curl Down the Middle of Her Forehead"... her father is just as much like that...
When she/he was good, she/he was very, very, good...
But when she/he was bad, she/he was horrid.

Sometimes I find him to be humorous... There may or may not be a direct correlation between the amount of humor I find and the amount of wine I have consumed...

On Saturday night the two of them sat on the couch together... as the Angsty Teen was perusing Pinterest.

I'd only had a little wine... so, that was unfortunate...

The Stern German (SG), who is totally exemplifies functionality... not creativity or stylishness... was commenting to the Angsty Teen (AT)...

SG: Who's that?
AT: It's Usher.
SG: What's that mean?
AT: What?
SG: What is that?
AT: He's a singer, rapper dude... He's not a church usher...

SG: What's that guy wearing?
AT: That guy?
SG: Yeah, his pants are red!
AT: They are straight-legged jeans... colorful one.
SG: His pants are short. His jacket is too tight. He looks stupid.
AT: He's a hipster.
SG: A what?
AT: A hipster...
This is what the Angsty Teen tweeted at that point:


SG: What is that guy wearing?
AT: What? Purple shoes, purple belt, black jeans....
SG: Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
AT: Wouldn't you wear that?
SG: I'm not gay.

SG: What are you supposed to glean from looking at this?

SG: What's with the kilt?

SG: Is there anything on here for men?
AT: Cars and motorcycles... does that make you happy?
SG: Where's the hunting stuff?
AT: Oh, they've got an outdoor section.

So the Angsty Teen clicks on the "Outdoor" tab.
SG: Outdoor... decorating??? That's ridiculous.

SG: What's that?
SG: It's a gun...Woohoo!


SG: This thing is more for women.


SG: I don't think much of preppers.
AT: Peppers?
SG: Preppers.
AT: What's a "prepper"?
(I'm looking sadly at my empty wine glass...  wondering if he means "preppies"?)
SG: Someone who stores up stuff for the end of the world.
(Pretty sure that even though people do that... that "prepper" isn't a real word.

The Angsty Teen gives it one more try to convince her dad that Pinterest is great...
AT: What about that guy?
SG: Ooooohhh... look at that... what'd they do? Seasoned a cast iron pan! (He was genuinely impressed!)

SG: Pancakes? Ooooohhh.... that's interesting... (and he really thought it was!)

SG: What's that? Click on it... I want to see, I want to see.... "Do It Yourself Firestarters"!

By this point, even though he was starting to not hate Pinterest, the Angsty Teen was pretty annoyed with the Stern German... I just wanted them out of the living room and/or I wanted a(nother) full glass of wine. Okay... that's a lie... no "and/or"... just "and"... (Hey, Kati... bet you wish you'd been here!)

SG: Are you ready for me to go away?
AT: (farts)
The Stern German leaves the room... Clearly, she should've tried that tactic a long time ago...

2 comments:

  1. HAHAHA that is amazing and I seriously need to send you wine just for witnessing it.

    Also, prepper, surprisingly, is a real word. They call themselves Dooms Day Preppers. Or at least they do on Bones, and tv is always real life...

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  2. hahaha...maybe you should have farted, cleared the room, then had another glass of wine! And I didn't know they were called 'preppers'. Your blog is informative :-)

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